


Rules of Engagement

by nochick_fics



Series: Blind Date [2]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist (Anime 2003)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, M/M, Past Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-14
Updated: 2017-04-14
Packaged: 2018-10-18 19:09:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10623267
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nochick_fics/pseuds/nochick_fics
Summary: Roy and Ed attempt to plan the perfect wedding while dealing with their insistent best friends, their very gay rabbits, and an unexpected blast from the past. (Sequel to Blind Date.)





	1. Planning to Plan

If Ed had known that becoming engaged would lead to _this_ , he would have popped the question himself the second he first laid eyes on him two years ago.

He leaned back in the chair and watched, mesmerized, as Roy Mustang, his lover, his _fiancé_ , was stretched out on the bed, gloriously naked, with one hand wrapped around his cock and three fingers shoved as far as they would go into his lube-slicked ass.  It was hard to believe that the same man whose ego had once vehemently refused to allow him to make even the tiniest bit of noise while he was in such a compromising position was now lying there with his legs spread wide, gasping and moaning _very_ _loudly_ as he stroked and finger fucked himself. 

It was one of the most beautiful sights that Ed had ever seen.  And it was _all his_.

His hand slowly moved up his thigh until it reached the painfully swollen tent in the crotch of his jeans—

“Stop that,” Roy panted.

Ed frowned.  “Come on.  I’m gonna fucking come in my goddamn pants if you don’t hurry up,” he warned.

Roy lifted his head and looked at the teen.  “You wanted to watch me do this.  So sit there and _watch_.”

With a groan of agony, Ed clutched the arms of the chair and squirmed about uncomfortably.  He could feel that he was already considerably wet down there and he wasn’t sure how much longer he could stand the torture of doing absolutely nothing about it.

Roy let his head fall down to the pillow and resumed his erotic display of self-abuse.  His hips started moving faster, bucking into his fist and then back onto curled digits, again and again and again in an enticing and hypnotic rhythm.  Ed whimpered desperately, eyes wide and mouth open and _dangerously_ close to doing something to his seat that defied traditional use. 

“Fuck, Roy… _please_ …”

Ed could almost _feel_ the smirk of victory blooming on the bastard’s face.  To this day, it was still a silly mark of pride for one of them to make the other utter that word in the bedroom.

“Get over here.”

The words had barely left Roy’s mouth when Ed bolted from the chair, stripped down to nothing, and crawled into the bed.  If he hadn’t been so insanely horny, he would have taken a moment to enjoy the vision of the older man, open and slick all over and waiting for him.  Instead, he hurriedly wrapped his arms around Roy’s legs and pressed forward with as much patience as he could muster, sliding into the unbelievably tight warmth of his lover’s body.

_“Ohhhhhhhh…”_

When Ed finally managed to stop trembling, because _fuck_ did it ever feel good inside of him, he let go of Roy’s legs and gripped the sheets just above his shoulders for leverage.  Roy stared at him with an expression of amusement and adoration and locked his legs around Ed’s ass, bearing down. 

“Fuck me,” he whispered, his voice low and husky and the sexiest thing in life.  “As hard as you can.”

And so Ed did. 

*****

After showering and dressing, Ed sat down on the edge of the bed and began braiding his drying hair.  Riza and Winry were going to be there in a couple of hours for dinner and he supposed that he should start cooking—or _attempting_ to cook—since he was presently the only one in the room who wasn’t indisposed.  He glanced over his shoulder at the man who couldn’t quite yet move and silently congratulated himself on a job well done. 

Roy wasn’t the only one in their relationship with an ego.

“So how many times has Riza asked you if we’ve set a date yet?”

“About a hundred,” Roy replied.  “I think she’s going to resort to violence if we don’t start planning this thing.”

Ed chuckled as he tied off the end of his braid and let it fall against his back.  “Well, it’s been a few months now.  I suppose it’s about time we started, isn’t it?”

“Is there a timeline for this sort of thing?”

“I have no idea.  But if nothing else, it’ll keep you from being murdered.”

Roy grinned and twirled Ed’s braid between his fingers.  “Good point.”

“Besides, it’s not like we have to get married tomorrow or anything.  Oh!”  Ed turned around.  “What should we do about our names?”

“Our names?”  Roy was confused.  Getting fucked tended to do that sometimes.

“Our _last_ names.”

“Ah.  Well, we could always do the hyphen thing.  Like Edward Elric-Mustang.”

Ed raised a curious brow.  “Or Roy Mustang-Elric.”

The partners stared at each other in a defiant unspoken challenge.  As with damn near everything else in their joint lives, the issue of last name order was destined to be the subject of much debate if they chose to go that route. 

“We could also do the name smash thing,” Ed offered.  He thought for a moment.  “Elstang.”

Roy snorted.  “Or Mustric.”

They stared at each other.

“Elstang-Mustric!” they shouted in unison before breaking into a fit of laughter. 

By the time they managed to get a hold of themselves, Ed was curled up in the bed beside Roy. 

Funny how things like that seemed to happen. 

“I don’t really care about any of this,” Roy said, kissing a crown of damp blond hair.  He then pulled Ed’s left hand to his mouth and kissed the platinum band that adorned his ring finger.  “I just want to marry you.”

“So if I get us a matching pair of neon pink tuxes—”

“I wouldn’t have to do a thing because Riza would kill you first.”

Ed grinned into Roy’s chest. 

“Our wedding is going to be perfect, no matter what we decide to do,” Roy reassured him. 

Ed closed his eyes and nodded.  There were still times when it didn’t seem possible to be as completely happy as he was.  Roy Mustang was the best partner ever…

“Still no on the wedding dress, huh?”

“Seriously, Roy.  _Fuck you_.”

… until he wasn’t.

*****

“Have you guys set a date yet?” Riza asked.

“One hundred and one,” Roy muttered.

“What?”

The woman glared at Roy and Ed, who almost choked on a bite of twice baked potato in an effort not to laugh out loud. 

“Nothing.”  Roy answered.  “And no, we haven’t.  But you’ll be the first one to know when we do.  Promise.”

“Oooh, you guys should have a winter wedding,” Winry said.  “It would be so beautiful.”

“A spring wedding would be just as nice,” Riza replied.

“Or a fall wedding, with all the warm colors,” Winry suggested.

“How about a summer wedding on the beach?” Riza asked.

“We’ll have a wedding every season if it’ll shut you both the hell up,” Roy said, scooting away from Riza to avoid the repercussions of his smart mouth.

The doorbell rang, sparing him from certain death.  Riza set down her fork and rose from the table.  “We’re just trying to be helpful.  Asshole.”

“I love you, too.”

While Riza answered the door, Ed smacked Winry’s hand with a fork— _“Ow!!!”—_ and helped himself to the last twice baked potato.  He had surprised everyone by making something that was not only edible but actually _delicious_ and as such, he felt entitled to the last one and would not hesitate to draw blood in an effort to get it.

“Are we expecting anyone else?” he asked, taking a bite while Winry pouted.

Roy shook his head.  “It’s probably someone selling something.  Vacuum cleaners, dictionaries, God, whatever.  That’s why I like to let Riza get the door when she’s here.  She’ll know how to get rid of—”

_“Roy.”_

The trio froze when they heard Riza’s voice.  It was lacking its usual bite.

It was _serious_.

Roy left the table.  Ed watched him until he disappeared from sight, his appetite suddenly dampened by worry. 

“What do you think that was all about?” Winry asked him.

Ed had no idea.  But damned if he was about to sit there without finding out.

He got up and made his way to the front door.   Riza’s eyes widened nervously upon seeing him. 

Riza Hawkeye?  _Nervous?_

Roy hadn’t noticed him at all.  He was too busy gaping at the man in the doorway like he had seen a ghost. 

A tall and drop dead gorgeous man of a ghost, with dark hair, a thin beard, and the most stunning green eyes that Ed had ever seen.

“Hello,” he said, looking at the teen as if he knew him.  “You must be the fiancé.”

And apparently he did, to some degree.

The man walked over to Ed and stuck out his hand.  Ed did not remember taking it, but even so, he found his own hand held captive to a firm handshake.

“I’m Maes.”

He smiled.

“The _ex-boyfriend_.”


	2. Forgotten Memory Lane

“Ex-boyfriend?”

The shock in Ed’s voice was practically palpable.  Roy felt the young man’s eyes fall upon him, begging him for clarification.  But he had no idea what to say, no clue how to even begin to explain the sudden appearance of the person he never thought he would see again.

Unfortunately, Maes was all too willing to speak up.  “You didn’t know about me?  Well… this is a little awkward then.”  He offered Ed an apologetic smile.  “I’m sorry.  I just assumed that the two of you did the full disclosure thing, being engaged and all.”

“Maes,” Riza barked, causing the three men to jump.  “Why are you here?”

Maes turned his smile on her.  “Oh, Riza.  Still the loyal guard dog, I see?”

“Ed,” Roy began slowly, finally emerging from his stupor.  “Maes and I… knew each other… _a very long time ago_.”

“That’s one way of putting it,” Maes said.

“How long?” Ed asked.

Roy blinked in confusion.  “How long ago did we know each other?”

“How long were you together?”

“Four years,” Maes replied a little too casually.

“Four years?”  Ed spun on Roy, his expression full of disbelief.  _“Four years?”_

He stormed away before Roy could reply.  Roy’s first instinct was to go after him, to tell him the long overdue story of a time in his life that he had worked so incredibly hard to forget.  But first…

“Riza.  Give us a minute.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Please.  It’s okay.”

Although it was clearly the last thing that she wanted to do, Riza did as she was asked, but not before giving Maes a glare full of ominous warning. 

“I always said that you should keep a leash on her,” Maes said when they were finally alone.

“She looks out for me.”  Roy took a deep breath and forced himself to stare his ex in the face.  It was not an easy thing to do.  “What are you doing here, Maes?”

“I wanted to congratulate you.”

Roy was not buying it.  “Not a word from you in ten years and you just happened to stop by to congratulate me?  Bullshit.”

Maes was offended by the doubt.  “It isn’t bullshit,” he insisted.  “I came back into town a few days ago and ran into Jean Havoc.  You remember him, don’t you?”

Roy certainly did.  Jean was one of the last people Roy fucked before being set up on a certain blind date.  That had been quite the accomplishment for him at the time, bedding a straight man.  “Yeah.”

The knowing gleam in Maes’ eyes revealed that he also knew that Roy’s connection with Jean had not been entirely platonic. 

“Well we were catching up and started talking about our relationships and all.  He’s seeing this cute little nerdy girl named Sheska now, in case you were wondering.”

“I wasn’t.”

Maes chuckled.  “I didn’t think so.  Anyway, he told me that you had been seeing some hot blond for the past two years and that you popped the question.  I have to admit that at first I just assumed that the hot blond was a woman.”

“Just because you don’t swing that way anymore doesn’t mean that the rest of us don’t,” Roy pointed out.

“I never swung that way at all,” Maes said quietly.  “It was you, Roy.  Just you.”

Roy could feel old anger threatening to breach.  “I really need you to leave.”

Maes stared at him for a moment before nodding.  “I understand.”   He reached into his pocket, pulled out a business card, and offered it to Roy.  “I’ll be here for a few weeks.  I was hoping that we could talk sometime.  I think that a little closure would be good. For _both_ of us.” 

Although every single inch of Roy wanted to tell Maes what he could do with his business card and his closure, he eventually relented.  As he accepted the card, he noticed the other man’s wedding band for the first time, the ultimate symbol of everything that had come dangerously close to destroying him.  The sight of it was like salt pouring into a very old wound that had never completely healed the way it should have.

“I honestly didn’t mean to cause you any trouble,” Maes assured him.  “It never occurred to me that you wouldn’t have told him about me.  Gracia knows all about you.”

Just hearing that name made Roy’s teeth clench. 

“Goodbye, Maes.”

“Goodbye.”

Maes left.  But the damage was already done. 

Memories, good ones and bad ones, flooded Roy’s mind, instantly undoing years worth of hard-fought suppression and denial.  But before he could deal with that, he had to deal with Ed.

It was finally time to tell him everything.

*****

The teen was sitting on the edge of their bed, staring down at his hands, when Roy entered the bedroom. 

“Ed?”

“Are Riza and Winry still here?”

“No, they left.”  Roy neglected to add that Riza had dutifully offered to shoot Maes as she had come frighteningly close to doing once before. 

He closed the door and cautiously approached the bed.  While he did not want to believe that Ed would resort to violence over the fiasco that had ruined their dinner, it was better to be safe than sorry. 

Ed raised his head and looked at him.  There was anger in his eyes.  And rightfully so. 

“He gave you his number?” he asked, noticing Maes’ card in Roy’s hand. 

Roy did not even realize that he was still holding it until Ed spoke of it.  “Yeah,” he said, quickly shoving it into his pocket.

“… Are you going to call him?” 

The tone of Ed’s voice warned Roy that he was treading on very dangerous ground. 

“Listen, Ed--”

“Four years, Roy.”  Ed glared at him, furious.  “You were in a relationship with this guy for _four fucking years_ and you didn’t think to tell me about it?”

“No, I didn’t.”

_“Why not?”_

Roy closed his eyes.  Images from the past raced behind his lids.

“I was seventeen.  A junior in high school,” he started, seeing the boy he once was.  “I joined JROTC because it seemed like an easy A, and it got me out of classes once a week.  Plus at the time I was considering a career in the military.  That’s how we met.”

He risked a glance at Ed and saw that he had his attention.

“We hit it off and became good friends.  At first, that’s all it was.  By that time, I had already pretty much figured out that I was… fluid… when it came to sex, but I never thought about him like that.”  Roy paused.  “Not until we started drinking together.”

He sat down on the bed, close to Ed, but not too close.

“We blamed it on the alcohol,” he continued.  “It wasn’t gay if we were drunk.  That was how we saw it, anyway.  But then after a while, we stopped drinking.  It was what it was.  And it stayed that way for three more years… until…”

“Until what?” Ed asked, his curiosity seeming to match his displeasure by that point.

Roy smoothed his hand along the bedspread, his face drawn in a frown as he recalled that last day, the day that changed everything. 

“I didn’t mind the idea of being out.  Not _out_ out.  I still liked girls, after all.  But I was tired of hiding and sneaking around and having sex on the sly. The person I was with just happened to have a dick.  It wasn’t a big deal.”  He sighed deeply.  “To _me_.”

Understanding dawned on Ed’s face.  “He left you.”

“Yes, he did.  And about a month later, he hooked up with the woman he would eventually marry.”  Roy smiled bitterly.  “Of course he had no problem being out about _her_.” He leaned back in the bed and stared at the ceiling.  “I… didn’t take it very well,” he said.  “It was bad.  Life is supposed to _start_ when you’re twenty-one, not feel like it’s over.  I wallowed in my grief for a while and then… I decided to get over it.”

“And that’s when you started screwing everything under the sun,” Ed concluded.

Roy nodded.  “You’d be amazed at what you can forget when you fuck enough people.  I didn’t want to even _think_ about feeling that way about anyone again, and I didn’t until I met you.”  He reached out and grabbed Ed’s left hand, taking it into his.  “So no, Ed.  I didn’t think to tell you about him.  Not because I had something to hide, but because I spent years trying _not_ to remember that he even existed.  And it worked.  Until now, obviously.”

With his story now finished, Roy waited patiently for Ed to respond.

Which he eventually did.

By punching him in the arm.

“Idiot,” the teen grumbled before crawling into bed beside him. 

It was forgiveness, as only Ed could give. 

Roy smiled gratefully as warm and cool limbs wrapped around him.  What he had felt for Maes once upon a time was _nothing_ compared to this.  He loved Ed so much that it almost physically hurt. 

“Is there _anything else_ that I need to know about you?” Ed asked. 

“Nothing I can think of.”  After a minute, Roy changed his mind.  “Oh.  I blew a cop to get out of a speeding ticket once.  Does that count?”

Ed propped his chin on Roy’s chest and shook his head.

“Now see?  _That_ doesn’t surprise me at all.”


	3. Setting the Date

In the week following the ex-boyfriend debacle, during which Ed discovered that his significant other was significantly deeper than he had ever believed possible, life returned to normal for Roy and Ed. 

Well, normal for _them_.

Between work and school and lesbian BFFs and homosexual bunnies, everything was as it should have been. 

And of course there was the sex.  There was _always_ the sex. 

They were having sex right now, as a matter of fact:

_“Fuck yeah!”_ Ed screamed, the side of his face plastered against the headboard of their bed as Roy fucked him hard and fast from behind.  “Right there.  _Ahhhh!_ ”

The older man grabbed him by the ponytail (his _rein_ , as Roy had taken to playfully calling it) and pulled on it, yanking Ed’s head back as he thrust.  His other hand snaked under his lover and grabbed onto Ed’s cock, and he stroked him until his hand was dripping wet and a rather colorful and impressive string of expletives echoed throughout the bedroom.  Roy then flipped him over and finished the job by jerking himself off and spurting all over Ed’s body with a grunt and a shudder.

Afterwards, Ed pulled him down close, wrapping his arms and legs around him and sharing the mess.  They touched foreheads and shut their eyes, catching their breath, before kissing each other in a slow and gentle and loving manner that was a stark contrast to their fucking. 

“Does this get even better after we’re married?” Ed asked after they parted.

Roy snorted.  “I don’t see how it _could_.”

Ed smiled and trailed cool digits along Roy’s spine.  In turn, Roy weaved his fingers through disheveled blond hair, smoothing it out along the pillow.  They remained that way a little while longer, touching and not talking, until a loud, crashing noise from the next room over jolted them back to reality.

“What the hell was that?”  Roy reluctantly rolled off of Ed and sat up in the bed.

“No idea,” Ed responded. 

Roy left Ed to recover and got up to investigate.  The rabbits were in that adjoining room, but it was not as if they would be the cause of such a ruckus…

*****

… except that they _were_.

“How the hell did that even happen?” Ed asked some twenty minutes later from the doorway, now dressed in black shorts and cradling a rabbit under each arm.

Roy had just finished placing lining in the cage, which had mysteriously fallen to the floor from its usual stand, startling, but otherwise and thankfully not harming their pets.  “No idea,” he began as he replaced the water bottle.  “Well, actually, I _do_ have an idea,” he amended.  “But… I can’t even begin to imagine that it’s possible.”

“What do you think…?” 

Ed paused mid-question.  He considered.  And then he realized what Roy was getting at.

“No way,” he said, shaking his head.  “They _couldn’t_ have.”

“Do you have a better theory?  I mean, we’ve broken beds before.”

“Yeah, but we never fucked so hard that _the entire house_ flipped over.” 

“Felt like it might on a few occasions,” Roy mumbled.

Ed grinned and nodded.  “Well… yeah.” 

He held up a rabbit in each hand and set his expression to stern.  “Bad bunnies!  No more rough sex!”

Roy had to bite his tongue to keep from laughing out loud because yes, his fiancé was indeed admonishing two adorably fluffy male rabbits for apparently screwing to the point of knocking their cage from its stand. 

See?  Their life was totally normal. 

Or something kind of like it.

*****

“I just got a text from Riza,” Roy announced later that night as Ed entered the living room, fresh from the shower.

“Oh yeah?”  Ed curled up on the couch beside him, nestling comfortably under the open arm that awaited him.

Roy showed Ed his phone.  Ed peered at the display. 

_Pick a goddamn date already or I’m going to shoot you in the dick._

“Well, we can’t have that,” he said between chuckles.  “Why don’t we just pick a random date and tell her?”

“Because she’ll hold us to it,” Roy replied.  “And God forbid we change it.”

“Okay.”  Ed thought for a moment.  “I suppose that Valentine’s Day is too cliché.”

“I proposed to you on Valentine’s Day,” Roy reminded him, mildly affronted.

“That was different,” Ed pointed out.  He kissed the not-quite-pouting man on the cheek.  “And perfect.”

Roy smiled, feathers unruffled and ego placated.  “So pick a date.”

“Shouldn’t we be deciding this together?”

“It honestly doesn’t matter to me, Ed,” Roy said as he leaned into him.  “Like I said before, I just want to marry you.  I don’t care when and I don’t care how.  So go ahead.  Pick the first date that pops into your head.”

“May 20th.”

Roy contemplated Ed's choice.  After a while, he shrugged.  “Works for me.”

Ed was not entirely convinced.  “Just like that?”

“Just like that.”  Roy curled his leg over Ed’s.  He aimed the remote at the television and ran through the channels.  “So, May 20th… oh, wait a minute.”

“I knew it,” Ed said.  “You don’t like it.”

“No, it’s not that.”  Roy set the remote aside and turned to face him.  “But do you mean May 20th of next year… or _next week_?”

Ed’s mouth fell open in shock.  “Shit.”

It had not even occurred to him that the date was, literally, right around the corner.

“Well, next week is just too soon,” he said.  “There’s no way we could plan an entire wedding on such short notice.”

“Would you rather wait another year?” 

To be honest, and to his utter surprise, Ed realized that no, he absolutely did _not_ feel like waiting that long.  Roy was not the only one who simply wanted to marry the man he loved, with or without all of the pomp that normally accompanied such an event. 

But next week? 

“Look, I’ll just pick another date--”

“No.” Roy was emphatic in his denial.  “Your subconscious chose that date for a reason, so that’s the date we’re sticking with.  Now decide: next week or next year?”

Ed was at a loss. 

This was crazy. 

Insane.

Impossible!

“Fuck it.”  He shook his head at his own daring.  “Okay, let’s do it.  Next week.”

The expression on Roy’s face said it all.  Ed made the right choice.

He yelped when Roy tackled him into the sofa, the older man’s happiness unspoken yet practically tangible in its enormity.  Tender hugging and kissing gradually grew a little heavier and harder until Ed was all but buried in the plush sofa cushions by the frantic thrusting of eager hips.  Some shorts tugging and shirt pulling and a few swear words later and they were naked (or close enough) and sliding together until the friction became unbearable.  Roy moved down the couch, his tongue tracing a hot trail along Ed’s abdomen.  Ed slung one leg over the back of the couch and let the other fall to the floor, and Roy lowered himself between those wide parted thighs, mouth open and ready to--

Another crash this time.  It was louder than the one before or perhaps just amplified in the stillness of the night.  Roy halted, his lips _so close_ to their objective, and at that rate neither he nor Ed could guarantee that those two adorably fluffy male rabbits--who had already gotten farther than Roy and Ed had that night--would live to see the sunrise. 

*****

Eight days.

They were going to be married in _eight days_.

There were so many things to do that Ed’s head was spinning. 

Or maybe that was just the sex.

Probably a little bit of both.

He smiled against Roy’s chest, his body sated, his heart elated… and those goddamn rabbits back in their cage which was now _on the floor._ There was absolutely zero desire to sleep but he knew that he should try.  He was definitely going to need his rest if they were really going to cram months’ worth of planning into eight days. 

There was just one more thing he needed to say, though.  Something that he had been planning to say for the past week.  A small thing, really.

Only… not.

“Roy?”

“Hm?”

“I… I think that you should talk to Maes.”

Roy was silent for a very long time.  Ed could hear the man’s heartbeat beneath his ear, loud amidst all the nothing.

“… You don’t mind?”

Of course Ed minded.  If it was up to him, he would much rather kick Maes’ ass for what he did to Roy.  But that was the selfish side of him talking, the side that wanted to protect him.  The best thing for Roy was to put that chapter of his life behind him once and for all.  Denial had worked like a charm for years, but closure was better.  Ed knew that, deep down where it counted. 

“I can’t say I don’t mind,” he admitted.  “I just don’t want him to hurt you anymore.”

“He won’t.”  Roy tightened his hold on the young man.  “He _can’t_.”

“Good.”

Ed closed his eyes and let the sound of Roy’s heart lull him into sleep, with a smile on his face and absolutely no idea that _Maes_ was not the one who would cause the couple the most trouble in the days to come.


	4. Decisions, Decisions

Riza Hawkeye was pissed as hell.  And rightfully so, as far as she was concerned. 

Not that anyone in their right mind would be dumb enough to challenge that.

She stood in the center of Roy’s living room, glaring holy bloody murder at the two men sitting on the couch, the two men who did not dare to make eye contact with her under penalty of much pain and suffering.

The two men who just informed her that they were to be married in seven days.

_“Seven fucking days!”_ she roared again.   “I know I told you guys to hurry up and pick a date but come on now.  You’re killing me here.”

“Ed chose it,” Roy mumbled petulantly.  “Blame _him_.”

“Hey!”  Ed gaped at his partner, horrified--but not as surprised as he probably should have been--at having been thrown under the bus by a man who knew the wrath of this particular woman all too well. 

“Whatever.”  Riza folded her arms and began to pace around.  “Okay.  I suppose that we’re just going to have to make this work.  Now have the two of you decided on anything else?  Where is this wedding going to happen?”

Silence.  She figured as much.

“How many people do you plan on inviting?”

More silence. 

“What about music?  Do you have any idea what song you want to use for your first dance?”

“Something by Debbie Gibson,” Roy answered.

“Only in your dreams,” a mortified Ed shot back.

Riza slapped a hand to her forehead at the pun, clever though it was.  “Do you at least have any idea what your colors are going to be?”

 “Uh … I like red,” Ed offered.

“I prefer blue myself,” Roy countered.

“Purple it is,” Riza decided for them.  “There, that’s one choice down and _about a thousand_ to go.”

She snatched up her purse and stormed over to the door. 

“Alright, Winry and I will start making some phone calls.  Your job is to make a list of people you want to invite.  I suggest you keep it local since you’re only giving everyone _seven fucking days_ to plan on attending.  You also need to decide if you want to go casual or formal.”  Riza paused with her hand on the doorknob, staring over her shoulder at the lovers.  “Oh yeah, by the way, if you’re thinking about making those horndog rabbits of yours the ring bearers or something else equally and disgustingly adorable, forget about it.  Knowing them, they might start fucking halfway down the aisle.”

After a moment of thoughtful consideration, she added:

“Although I suppose I could say the same thing about the two of you.”

*****

One hour and an impromptu handjob later, the couple was sitting in bed with a pad of paper between them.  Ed gnawed furiously on the end of a pen as he stared at the list of potential wedding guests, a little over half of whom had been crossed off not too long after being written down.

“Seriously, Roy,” he began with a sigh.  “Isn’t there anyone you want to invite who _hasn’t_ had your dick somewhere inside of their body?” 

Roy pondered the question.  For a very long time.

“… Riza,” he finally concluded.  “And Winry.”

Ed could only shake his head.  Such was the price one paid for falling in love with a former man-slut. 

Not that his own contribution was much better.  Besides his two favorite gay ladies (the only two gay ladies he knew personally, as it were) the only person Ed really cared to have witness the nuptials was his little brother, Alphonse. 

“Maybe we _should_ keep it small,” he suggested.  “I don’t really care to have a whole bunch of people ogling me anyway.  Is that okay?”

Although Roy _did_ like being ogled, he could see where his less conceited other half was coming from.  “That’s fine with me.” He stretched out on the bed and wrapped his arms around Ed’s legs. “Now about what we’re going to wear…”

“Roy Mustang, if you ask me to wear a goddamn wedding dress one more time, I swear I’m going to put my foot up your ass.”

Roy grinned at the threat, which he knew was far from idle.  “I had no intention of doing that,” he assured him.  “What I was wondering was if we were going to do suits or tuxes?”

“Oh.”  Ed tossed the pen and paper aside.  He leaned back against the headboard of the bed as his fingers absentmindedly stroked the dark head of hair that had found its way onto his thigh.  “I’ve never worn a tux before,” he admitted. 

“I think you would look good in one.” Roy nuzzled his cheek against Ed’s leg and smirked when he felt an all too familiar bulge brush against his head.  “Really, Ed?”

“Your head’s in my lap,” Ed said, as if that explained it all.  “Do you object?”

Roy’s smile was wicked and promising. 

“Do I _ever_ object?”

He ran his hand along the length of Ed’s leg.  Soon, it was running along a _different_ sort of length. 

Ten minutes and an impromptu blowjob after _that_ , they finally finalized their guest list.  Twelve people total, including the grooms and best ladies (or best _lesbians_ , as Riza had jokingly called it).  It would hardly make for the biggest shindig in the world, but Roy and Ed felt good about their selections nevertheless.

They got dressed and fixed themselves a late lunch.  Riza called while they were eating and informed Roy that they would be checking out potential locales the following day as well as deciding on decorations and such.

“Ugh, decorating.”  Roy moaned into the phone.  “Riza, I really don’t care about any of that.  Just tell us where to be and we’ll be there.”

“Fuck that,” Riza replied in her oh-so-eloquent way.  “Besides, you’re gay.  You’re supposed to love doing that shit.”

After they finished talking, Roy excused himself to make a call.  Ed thought nothing of it at first; he simply assumed that the older man was speaking with someone about something pertaining to the wedding.  And it would not have been the first time that Roy took a call into another room for fear of being drowned out by Ed’s exuberant munching.  But when Ed’s ears picked up the sound of hushed and clipped speaking, his guard immediately went up.

He could only think of one person who could inspire such a tone.

Roy was talking to Maes.

Ed put down his half-eaten sandwich and strained his ears to hear something, _anything_ from the next room over.  But it was all for nothing when Roy came back into the kitchen muttering a curt “See you then” before ending the call and returning the phone to its base to charge. 

It shouldn’t have bothered him.  Except that it did.  Very much.  Ed knew that what he was feeling was nothing short of petty jealousy; he loved Roy and Roy loved him, end of story.  All the ex-boyfriends in the world could never change that. 

But that was just it.  There was only _one_ ex-boyfriend.  Roy could have fucked damn near every human being under the sun (and there were days when Ed suspected that he had) but only one of them had been important enough to be more than just a one night stand.  Maes Hughes was not some random guy or gal whose name Roy could hardly recall.  Maes was… _had been_ special.  Special enough to have had Roy’s heart in the palm of his hand--before he went and foolishly threw it away. 

Special enough that Roy had altered _his entire life_ just to forget about him.

“Everything alright?” he asked, hoping he sounded as calm and collected as he was attempting.

“I was just setting up a day and time to meet with Maes.”  Roy sat back down at the table and took Ed by the hand, his thumb gently grazing the smooth surface of a platinum band.  “I figured the sooner the better.  I’d rather not have it hanging over my head before the wedding.  You know, clean slate and everything.” 

Ed nodded slowly.  He wanted to support Roy, truly he did.  No matter how much it tore away at his insides to think about Roy and Maes being alone together, reminiscing and--for Maes’ part--perhaps even regretting.  Sure, the guy was married now, but who was to say that five minutes alone with Roy wouldn’t have him missing what he once had with him? 

Roy narrowed his eyes at the young man, his expression full of suspicion.  “Ed? Are you _absolutely positive_ that you’re okay with this?  Because if you’re not…”

“It’s _fine_ , Roy,” Ed insisted, forcing himself to look Roy in the eyes.  “If it wasn’t, I wouldn’t have said you should do it.”

After a while, Roy nodded.  “I know that, and I don’t mean to keep bugging you about it.  It’s just that… I don’t want to do anything that’s going to upset you.  I don’t need to have closure with _him_ if it’s going to hurt _you_.”

And that was precisely why Ed resolved to keep his mouth shut, to keep a lid on his own issues to allow Roy the opportunity to deal with his.

Little did he know at the time that it was a promise he would be unable to keep.

Ed smiled warmly at his fiancé.  The man’s ego was as big as the planet.  But then again, so was his heart. 

He loved Roy.  So much that he could hardly stand it.

So much that he would even allow him to play his stupid Debbie Gibson songs at their reception.

Well… no.  Not _that_ much.

… Maybe.


	5. Too Little, Too Late

“I know I’ve said this before, but there _really_ ought to be a law against looking this good.”  
  
Roy did a slow turn in front of the dressing room’s full length mirror, craning his neck and inspecting himself from every possible angle.  
  
“I mean, really.  How can _this much gorgeousness_ be contained in one human being?”  
  
“And this much bullshit,” Ed muttered.  
  
“What?”  
  
“Nothing.”  
  
As Roy continued pirouetting and fawning over himself, Ed leaned against the far wall of the private room and rolled his eyes.  For about the hundredth time. That was not to say that his fiancé did not look good in the tux he was presently modeling; he looked _damn_ good.  However, Ed also thought that it would be nice if Roy gave someone else a chance to say so instead of announcing the fact for himself.  Repeatedly.  
  
But at least he had managed to stop admiring his own beauty long enough to compliment Ed, who really did look resplendent in his own tuxedo.  While the young man initially had serious reservations about how formal attire would suit him (pun intended), he was surprisingly pleased with the end result and had to admit that he looked pretty damn good himself.  
  
The fitting marked the last event on the painfully long to-do list that Riza made for them that day.  Their morning had been crammed full of pre-wedding tasks normally spread out over a more manageable period of time.  First came ordering their wedding cake.  Ed did not mind this particular task so much since it allowed him to taste test every single item to his heart’s content.  Twice, in some cases.  Then came the fun and excitement of buying decorations, whereupon the couple learned that there were entirely too many shades of purple in the world.  After that, they went on the hunt for a ring for Roy.  This was the easiest of all since Roy was surprisingly agreeable about selecting a piece of jewelry that he would be wearing for the rest of his life.  And finally came the tuxedo fitting.  Luckily, both men’s suits would need little in the way of alteration--although Ed was still mildly off-put by the amount of measuring near the crotch area for that conclusion to be drawn.  So all in all, it was a busy and tiring day, one that was barely half over.  Of course neither man would dare risk their lives by complaining of exhaustion within earshot of their trigger happy friend.  It was the price they had to pay for wanting to be married in six days.  
  
When he eventually remembered that he was not the sole inhabitant of the entire universe, Roy turned to Ed and smiled warmly, and Ed instantly forgave him for his unrepentant vanity.  It really wasn’t fair that the man could turn on the charm and pretty much get away with murder, but such was life with Roy.  Ed allowed the older man to pull him close and wrap his arms around him, and the prospective grooms silently regarded their reflections, the sight of which served as a preview of the big day to come.  There were so many things that Ed wanted to say but no words seemed even remotely capable of expressing the way he felt, standing there in the arms of his husband-to-be. It was such a perfect, happy moment—  
  
“Damn.  I have to go,” Roy said, glancing at his watch.  
  
Ed tried not to let his disappointment show as Roy planted a kiss on top of his head before letting him go and getting undressed.  It wasn’t so much that Roy was leaving.  But, rather, where he was going.  
  
He was leaving to meet with Maes.  
  
“I shouldn’t be more than a couple of hours, if that.”  Roy carefully unbuttoned his shirt as he spoke.  “Do you want me to bring you anything?”  
  
Even if Ed hadn’t been stuffed to the gills with cake, he hated the idea of Roy bringing him something from a lunch date with his ex, irrational though it was.  He hated the idea of the whole damn thing, but since he was also the one who had all but forced Roy to confront his former partner, he couldn’t very well complain about it now, could he?  
  
“No, thanks,” he said as he stripped off his pants.  “I think I’ll just raid Winry’s fridge.”  
  
Once they were back in their civilian attire, the couple finalized their order and paid their deposit.  They then exited the shop, where Winry was waiting to keep Ed company while Roy was off with Maes.  Roy leaned over and kissed his lover on the lips this time, slowly and deeply, until Winry loudly cleared her throat to remind them that she was still standing there.  
  
“Sorry about that,” Roy said before turning to Ed.  “I’ll see you soon.”  
  
He got into his car and took off, leaving the friends to stare after him.  Although Ed was still reeling from his kiss—because _goddamn_ , that man could melt glaciers with his lips if he wanted to—the reality of the situation was truly settling in now, that for the next two or three or million hours (same difference as far as he was concerned), Roy would be with the only other person in the world that he had ever loved.  How the hell was that supposed to sit right with him?  
  
It wasn’t an issue of trust because Ed trusted Roy completely.  
  
He did.  
  
He really, really did.  
  
But still…  
  
“Ed?  Are you listening to me?”  
  
Ed blinked at Winry, utterly clueless as to what she just said.  “I’m sorry, Winry.  What’d you say?”  
  
Winry sighed but offered no further complaint.  As Ed’s closest friend, she was well aware of Ed’s feelings regarding the matter at hand.  “I asked you if there was anywhere else you needed to go before we went back to my place.”  
  
“Well, actually…”  
  
Their eyes met.  Ed’s face said it all.  
  
“No,” Winry said, shaking her head.  _“No way.”_  
  
“Either that or I drive you crazy for the next few hours.  Come on, Winry.”  
  
“Ed, this is nuts!”  
  
“I know.  _Please?_ ”  
  
Winry looked into his wide eyes and gave up the fight.  As if she ever had a choice. “Fine.”  
  
Ed smiled happily.  “Thanks, Winry.”  
  
“Shut up.”  
  
“It’ll only take a minute,” he promised as he eagerly jumped into her car.  “We’ll just do a quick drive-by.”  
  
Oh, if only that blatant lie was the worst thing that would happen that day.  
  
*****  
  
“Holy shit.”  
  
Maes took off his glasses and rubbed at his eyes before putting them back on, his expression incredulous.  Then again, one could hardly blame him after listening to Roy’s extensive list of sexual conquests, impressive feats accomplished as the result of a broken heart.  
  
“That’s… _a lot_ of sex,” he added.  
  
Roy shrugged and picked up his glass.  He was on his third drink now and he knew that he should probably slow down, seeing as how he still had to drive home.  Unfortunately, sobriety and being around Maes did not seem to go hand in hand.  “I needed to forget that you existed,” he said, downing the rest and signaling for another.  “It did the trick.”  
  
“Apparently.”  Maes took a sip of his own drink before speaking again.  “I guess I was worried for nothing.”  
  
“If you were so worried about me, then why did I never hear from you?”  Roy snapped his fingers as if remembering something crucial.  “Oh, that’s right.  Because you were too busy getting married and living your happy, hetero life.”  
  
The two men fell quiet as a server brought Roy another drink.  Roy stared down into the glass in front of him, unwilling to meet the other man’s contemplative gaze.  Minutes passed, silent and awkward.  
  
“Roy,” Maes began, speaking quietly, sincerely.  “What I did to you was incredibly shitty.  I know that.  And I wish that I could tell you that it was because of something other than my own fear.  You have no idea how much I wish that was the case.”  He leaned back in his seat and folded his arms, his green eyes full of sorrow.  “I wish I could have been braver about you.  About us.  But I wasn’t. The sex was one thing but I never expected to fall in… to have feelings for you.  When I realized that I did, I panicked.   And I’m sorry.  I know it doesn’t matter anymore and that you’re happy now, and I’m _glad_ that you’re happy now.  But even so, for what it’s worth… I’m so sorry.”  
  
Only then was Roy able to meet Maes’ stare, his brow creased in a frown.  “Why didn’t you say all of this to me years ago?  Back when it actually _did_ matter?”  
  
“Would it have made a difference?  Would you have hated me any less?”  
  
Roy opened his mouth to reply and then reconsidered.  He knew the answer as it stood now, years after the fact and having long since moved on.  But back then?  
  
“Exactly,” Maes said with a knowing nod.  “And then I met Gracia and… all of that… and I just figured the best thing to do was distance myself from you as much as possible. For both our sakes.”  
  
More silence, and just as awkward as before.  It stretched out for what felt like forever, until Maes finally spoke up again.  
  
“Say something.”  
  
“You’re a fucking coward.”  Roy glared at the other man, resenting this sudden outpouring of regret more than he realized he would.  
  
Maes nodded again, as if he knew that, too.  “Anything else?”  
  
Before Roy could respond, his cell phone began to ring.  He glanced at the ID and while he did not recognize the number, he assumed it was wedding related.  But between the lack of reception and the abundance of noise, he could barely hear the party on the other end and he excused himself to take the call outside where he would be able to hear more clearly…  
  
*****  
  
“Okay, Ed.  We’ve been here almost half an hour.  I think we’re about five more minutes away from official stalker status.”  
  
Ed turned to look at Winry and felt a pang of guilt when he saw her worried expression.  And she had a damn good point, too.  Just what in the hell was he doing?  What was he expecting to find? And if he _genuinely_ trusted the man he wanted to spend forever with--which he did--then why was he staking out the place where said man was having lunch with an old flame?  
  
“You’re right,” he replied wearily as he ran his left hand over his face.  “God, what the fuck is wrong with me?”  
  
“You found out that you weren’t the first love of Roy’s life and now it’s slowly driving you batshit,” Winry said matter-of-factly.  “Sound about right?”  
  
Ed smiled at that.  Winry never pulled any punches when it came to telling the truth.  It was little wonder that she and Riza were so perfect together.  
  
“That sounds _exactly_ right,” he said.  “Come on, let’s get the hell out of here… Winry?  What’s wrong?”  
  
But Ed already knew.  Before he even followed the young woman’s horrified gaze beyond his shoulder, Ed just knew what was about to happen.  
  
And that it was going to end badly.  
  
“Ed?”  
  
Roy cautiously approached the open window of the passenger side of Winry’s car, the phone in his hand forgotten and his face a mixture of confusion and disbelief.  
  
“… What are you doing here?”


	6. The Waiting Game

Ed could not speak. And even if he would have had the slightest idea of what he wanted to say to Roy in that dreadful, awful moment, there was no way that his body was going to allow him to do anything other than sit there in Winry’s car and gape at Roy, horrified that he had been spotted doing something so very incredibly dumb.  
  
“What are you doing here?” Roy asked him again, even though the look on his face revealed that he already knew the answer. “Are you… following me?”  
  
Although the short answer was yes, so _insanely, stupidly_ yes, Ed knew that there was no way for him to explain the why behind his reasoning in the amount of time he would have needed to properly do so, not right there on the spot like that. But still, he wanted to try.  
  
“I… I just…”  
  
It was all he could manage to get out before Maes came out of the restaurant and approached the scene. Great. As if things weren’t bad enough already.  
  
“Roy?”  
  
Ed clenched his teeth at the sight of him, standing there beside his man as if he had the right. Yes, it was petty and childish, and deep, _deep_ down, Ed knew that this whole clusterfuck was not truly Maes’ fault, but even so, he was helpless against the wave of jealousy that washed over him. Things would have been so much easier if he had just stayed wherever the hell he was instead of showing up on their doorstep and complicating their lives.  
  
Only then did Maes realize what was going on, and his eyes widened behind his glasses when he saw Ed in the car.  
  
“Oh. Hello.” He glanced uncertainly at the couple, trying to gauge the awkward situation. “Is… everything… okay?”  
  
“Everything is fine,” Roy replied quietly. “Come on. Let’s go back inside.”  
  
Before he left, he spared one last look at Ed. There was grave disappointment in his expression, and it made the teen hurt all over to see it.  
  
“We’ll talk when I get home.”  
  
And with those not-so-promising words, Roy walked away, disappearing inside the restaurant with Maes in tow.  
  
“Shit.” While Ed was strongly tempted to go right in there and try to set things straight, he also knew that doing so would only make a bad situation worse. So instead, he closed his eyes and shook his head and wondered how the hell he had allowed so much to go so wrong.  
  
Winry reached out and placed her hand on his shoulder. “I’m really sorry, Ed.”  
  
“Yeah, me too,” Ed muttered. And he had a feeling that he was going to be even sorrier later.  
  
“So what do we do now?” Winry asked.  
  
Ed turned to look at his friend’s worried face. Right now, there was really only one thing that he _could_ do.  
  
“Take me home.”  
  
*****  
  
He was beginning to wonder if maybe he should have let Winry stay because the silence was about to drive him crazy.  
  
About an hour after he chased her off, insisting to the concerned girl that he really was okay, Ed finally broke down and switched on the television. He then leaned back on the couch and stared blankly at the screen. While the noise did drown out the sound of the nothing, unfortunately it did very little to quell the trepidation in Ed’s heart.  
  
Why, why, _why_ had he felt the need to stake out Roy’s lunch with Maes?  
  
No, Ed _knew_ why he did it. Even if it did seem silly in retrospect. Well, maybe not silly. But it was definitely not worth the trouble it caused. Not by a goddamn long shot.  
  
Ed hunched over and planted his face in the palms of his hands, left side warm, right side cool, and he tried to get a handle on himself, to tame the thoughts that were determined to spin out of control. He was so preoccupied with maintaining his sanity that he almost did not hear Roy come inside.  
  
Their eyes met across the living room, and the moment stretched out for what felt like ages. Eventually, Roy put an end to the silent face-off and walked over to a corner of the room, where they had piled the bags of wedding decorations that morning before taking off to buy Roy’s ring and get fitted for their tuxedos.  
  
Since it did not appear that Roy was going to be the one to start a conversation, Ed decided to take a chance. And although he wanted nothing more than to launch into an apologetic rant regarding his actions and the reason behind them, he thought it wiser, and _safer_ , to take the casual route first.  
  
“How did things go with Maes?” he asked tentatively.  
  
Roy shrugged nonchalantly before he kneeled down and began rummaging through the bags, extracting and rearranging and shoving as much purple crap (his words, earlier) as he could into as few bags as possible.  
  
“About as well as I figured it would,” he responded, his tone noticeably and _painfully_ aloof. “He explained why he dumped me, I explained how I got over it, he apologized, I said it didn’t matter anymore, and then… we were interrupted.”  
  
Ed winced at the subtle jab. His fingers dug into the sofa cushions as he waited for Roy to light into him, but the other man simply resumed the telling of his tale.  
  
“And after that we had lunch. He showed me pictures of his daughter, I told him how you and I met, and that was… pretty much that, I believe.” Roy grabbed a runaway spool of purple ribbon that had rolled out of one of the bags. “Oh, except for the part where he said that he wanted us to be friends again someday.”  
  
“Friends.” Ed was momentarily distracted from his relationship dilemma by his sudden urge to punch Maes Hughes in the throat.  
  
“Friends,” Roy confirmed.  
  
“... Is that what you want?”  
  
Roy carefully lowered a handful of silk flowers into one of the bags. “I don’t really believe that’s possible. Not anytime soon, at least. But if he happens to drop by in another ten years, I suppose I could stand to have a drink with him. Maybe.”  
  
He stared at Ed, his gaze just as cool as his voice.  
  
“Anyway, I think that just about covers it. Unless there was something else in particular that you needed to know about our meeting? Seeing as how you took such an interest in the situation.”  
  
That stung. It stung _a lot_. And Ed felt like shit all over again.  
  
“Look, Roy… about that…”  
  
“We’ll talk when I get home.”  
  
“Huh?” Ed blinked at his partner, confused. “But… you _are_ home,” he pointed out.  
  
“Yes, but now I’m leaving.”  
  
Roy rose to his feet and picked up two bags that were now packed full of ribbons and bows and fake flowers and other pretty things.  
  
“I’m going over to Riza’s to help her with this,” he said, lifting one of the overflowing bags for emphasis. “While I’m doing that, you’re supposed to come up with a song list for the reception. And I am to inform you that if that ‘Chicken Dance’ song or ‘Macarena’ are requested, you will be punished severely.” His lip quirked slightly. “Apparently she thinks that the Electric Slide is still an acceptable form of public humiliation,” he added.  
  
He looked at Ed, his expression somewhat softer than before. It wasn’t much but even that little bit made Ed feel that all was not completely lost.  
  
“I shouldn’t be too late,” he said as he moved towards the door. “I’ll stop and pick up something for dinner--”  
  
“Roy, wait. Please.”  
  
Roy paused by the door, the hand that was gripping the doorknob falling down to his side.  
  
“What?”  
  
Ed moved forward a bit, closing the distance between them.  
  
“What I did today… I don’t want you to think that it was because I don’t trust you.”  
  
“I know you trust me,” Roy said. “Even though stalking me would actually make more sense if you _didn’t_.”  
  
He turned around to face Ed.  
  
“But whatever the reason… and however justified you felt… we’re not starting out like that,” he continued. “I don’t want us to be one of those couples where one person is spying on the other, sneaking into their email, checking their phone… _following them to restaurants_. I won’t be in that kind of marriage, Ed.”  
  
Roy let out a long, deep sigh before speaking again.  
  
“I won’t be in that kind of relationship _at all._ ”


	7. Making Amends

_I won’t be in that kind of relationship at all._  
  
Those ominous words, spoken by Roy before he left, resounded through Ed’s mind, making it impossible for him to concentrate. He had no idea how the hell he was supposed to come up with a list of songs for the reception when all he could think about was the fact that there might not even _be_ a reception if he couldn’t find a way to get over this hurdle with Roy. And while he didn’t want to believe that the man had any intention of calling off the wedding, as evidenced by Ed’s present task, there was no way to know for certain until he and Roy could talk about what happened. Until then, Ed didn’t want to make any assumptions.  
  
He stared blindly at the empty notepad in front of him and tried his best to come up with something, but his mind refused to cooperate. At that moment, Ed didn’t give the first damn about the reception playlist. As long as he got to marry Roy, they could play fucking polka music for all he cared. Or even Debbie Gibson.  
  
Realizing that there was no point in trying to come up with anything right now, Ed tossed the notepad aside and wandered into the rabbits’ room, where two fluffy gay bundles of cuteness were huddled together in the corner of their cage. The teen busied himself by giving them fresh food and water, and he replaced the cage liner even though it didn’t yet need to be changed. It was a mindless chore, but it gave him something to focus on other than his own phenomenal blunder.  
  
By the time he finished and washed his hands, the doorbell sounded. Assuming it was Winry returning to check up on him, and eager for the chance to vent to an understanding party, Ed walked over to the door and opened it…  
  
… and saw that it was not her.  
  
In spite of all his worrying, Ed discovered that he still had some room left over for anger, as well.  
  
“Roy’s not here,” he said, glaring at the man on the other side of the door.  
  
If Maes was put off by Ed’s attitude, he didn’t show it.  
  
“I know,” he replied while pushing up his glasses. “I’m actually here to talk to you.”  
  
*****  
  
After Roy screwed up his fifth attempt at a centerpiece, Riza demoted him to curling ribbons.  
  
“Do you even have _one_ gay bone in your body?” she asked as she proceeded to correct his disastrous effort once again.  
  
“Just one,” Roy replied. “Want to know where it is?”  
  
“No, thank you.”  
  
They glanced at each other across the kitchen table while Winry toiled away at the stove behind them, having been given a pass from the project. The girl could maneuver her way around a car engine with her eyes closed but, much like Roy, the ability to create decorations eluded her.  
  
Riza grabbed the nearby glue gun and checked its readiness. “Well, at least you're not pouting anymore.”  
  
“I wasn’t pouting,” Roy insisted, offended by the accusation. “And thanks for trivializing my relationship issues.”  
  
“Oh, shut up and suck it up.” The woman started gluing the centerpiece in all the right places. “So your partner wanted to know that there was more to you besides your raving whoredom. How dare he?”  
  
Riza’s sarcasm was not lost on Roy. “There are other ways to go about it than stalking,” he pointed out.  
  
“Tell me about it. By the way, I ought to kick his little ass for getting Winry involved in this mess.”  
  
“Come on, Riza.” Winry glanced over her shoulder at her girlfriend. “It’s not like he held a gun to my head.”  
  
Riza wasn’t entirely convinced. Then again, she was always biased where Winry was concerned.  
  
“Did you ever stop to think that some of this is _your_ fault for not telling him anything about your past?” Riza asked Roy as she continued fashioning his mistake into a masterpiece. “I mean, yeah, it wasn’t the smartest thing for him to follow you, but can’t you see why he did it?”  
  
Roy frowned as he rolled the ribbon spool along the tabletop. “I guess,” he mumbled.  
  
“So? What are you going to do?”  
  
“Well, first I’m going to curl this ribbon.” Roy ran the edge of a pair of scissors along the length of the purple ribbon, which remained just as flat as it was before. “...Or maybe not.”  
  
“Good grief,” Riza groaned.  
  
“And then…”  
  
Roy fell silent for a moment. All he could think about was Ed’s expression as he left him earlier, miserable and heartbroken.  
  
“... I don’t know,” he concluded with a shrug.  
  
“Fine. _I’ll_ tell you what you’re going to do.” Riza reached across the table and confiscated the scissors and uncurled ribbon. “You’re going to go home.”  
  
“I thought I was supposed to be helping you.”  
  
“So did I,” Riza muttered. “But all you’re doing is making more work for me.” Her demeanor softened, revealing the side of her nature that few were lucky enough to see. “Go home. Straighten things out with Ed.”  
  
She rose to her feet and rounded the table, then swept her friend into a backwards embrace, resting her chin against the top of his head.  
  
“Because if you even _think_ about calling off this wedding now, I’m going to kill you.”  
  
*****  
  
“Why do you want to talk to _me_?” Ed asked Maes. He stood his ground by the door, his automail hand grabbing the knob tightly. “What could you possibly have to say to me?”  
  
“I’m sorry.”  
  
The apology caught Ed off guard. While he wasn’t exactly sure what he was expecting the other man to say to him, that certainly wasn’t it.  
  
“If I had known that you didn’t know about me, I wouldn’t have just come strolling up to your door the way I did,” Maes continued. “I honestly didn’t mean to cause any trouble. That was never my intention.”  
  
While Ed knew full well that he shouldered some… maybe even _most_ of the blame for what happened, and even though he could tell, deep down, that Maes was actually being sincere, he was feeling too sore to be rational.  
  
“What _was_ your intention, then?” He already knew, of course, since Roy had informed him earlier, but he still wanted to hear it directly from Maes himself.  
  
“I wanted to see if he was okay.” Maes shoved his hands into his pockets, his eyes hazed over in contemplation. “After what I did… I just… I just needed to know that he was happy. And now I see that he is. He’s happier with you than he ever was with me.”  
  
Ed couldn’t believe that he was actually feeling somewhat sympathetic towards this man, this fucking guy who just came waltzing back into Roy’s life after breaking his heart.  
  
But the look of regret on his face was obvious. It had only been a few hours and Ed could barely stand the regret of what he had done. He couldn’t begin to imagine dealing with it for _years_.  
  
“Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I won’t be bothering either of you anymore. When my business is done here, I’ll be going back home and… that’ll be that.” Maes pulled a set of car keys out of his pocket and twirled them around his long fingers. “It really _was_ nice meeting you, Ed. In spite of the circumstances. Good luck with the wedding.”  
  
He turned to leave and then stopped after a few steps. And although he was now facing away from Ed, his voice was still loud and clear. And just a little bit sad.  
  
“... Make sure that he _stays_ happy. Please.”  
  
And with that, he was gone.  
  
*****  
  
After Maes left, and feeling _slightly_ better than before, Ed finally started the song list.  
  
He decided that the best way to determine if a tune was fitting for the reception was to give it a listen. And so he sat down on the floor next to the stereo and started nosing through all of Roy’s old albums and CDs in an effort to pick what he felt were the most appropriate pieces.  
  
He smiled and shook his head when he came across the man's Debbie Gibson collection and begrudgingly decided to give her an honest chance since Roy was so inexplicably obsessed with her music. Although he still preferred Tiffany himself, he also loved Roy too much to make waves by saying so.  
  
Okay, so “Foolish Beat” was way too depressing. “Out of the Blue” was cheesy but kind of cute in an eighties way. “Shake Your Love” was a firm maybe. “Electric Youth”... eh. And Ed didn’t even realize that he was head-bopping to “Only in My Dreams” until the song was over, and he added it to the list with a blush and a swear.  
  
“Lost In Your Eyes” was next.  Roy’s favorite Debbie Gibson song. While Ed had already heard it more times than he could count, he now tried to picture dancing with Roy to the slow, sappy beat. And… it wasn’t half bad.  
  
Leaning back against a speaker, Ed closed his eyes and let his imagination take over. He could see it now, the two of them in their tuxes, holding each other tightly and swaying to the music. He could see them surrounded by all things purple, as well as their small circle of loved ones who watched them in admiration. He could see… Roy… standing in the living room and staring down at him--  
  
“What are you doing?”  
  
Ed sat up with a jolt. He was so lost in the music and the vision that he hadn’t even realized that he had opened his eyes.  
  
“Um.. I was… uh…”  
  
He could barely hear himself think over Debbie’s soulful teenage angsting, so he turned off the stereo and tried again.  
  
“I was just trying to decide on some songs,” he explained. “I-I didn’t hear you come in.”  
  
“Obviously.”  
  
Roy smiled and took a seat on the floor beside him. He grabbed the notepad and read over the songs that the young man had listed.  
  
“Do you even know _how_ to do the Electric Slide?” he asked.  
  
“No idea,” Ed admitted. “You?”  
  
“I tried it once,” Roy said. “Riza told me that I looked like I was having a seizure.”  
  
Ed couldn’t help but grin. He had thought the same thing once after he caught Roy “dancing” to a Debbie Gibson song.  
  
Now that the ice was broken, the lovers stared at one another. Roy’s smile slowly faded, and he set down the notepad and let out a heavy sigh.  
  
“I guess we need to talk now,” he said quietly.  
  
Lowering his head, Ed looked down at his hands, taking particular notice of his ring. His beautiful ring that symbolized the promise of infinite love and commitment.  
  
He wanted _so desperately_ to be past this part.  
  
Unfortunately, there was no way around it.  
  
“Yeah,” he replied with a nod. “I guess we do.”


	8. Bonus - A Matter of Opinion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A Riza/Winry interlude.

After _finally_ finishing the decorations for Roy and Ed’s upcoming wedding, Riza flopped down on the couch with a tired sigh, her face the very definition of exhausted. She groaned and stretched out horizontally, propping her head up on the arm of the couch.  
  
“Ugh, my hands are killing me. I swear if I have to look at another purple flower or ribbon or candle or… what the fuck ever… I’m going to shoot myself right in the face.” She lifted her legs long enough for Winry to sit down and then brought them to rest across her thighs. “I could seriously strangle both of them for deciding to get married on such short notice.”  
  
Winry smiled as she played with Riza’s toes. She looked at her partner with eyebrows raised, her expression amused and knowing.  
  
“It’s not like anyone is forcing you to do all the planning for them,” she pointed out. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think that you were actually _enjoying_ all of this.”  
  
“Like hell I am,” Riza replied just a little too quickly. “I’m just making sure that they don’t screw anything up.”  
  
“Mm-hm.”  
  
Winry wisely decided not to press the issue. She knew full well that Riza was just as stubborn as her best friend Ed, possibly even more so, and there was no point in trying to get her to admit what they both knew to be true.  
  
“Do you think they’ll work things out?” she asked instead.  
  
“Yeah,” Riza said with another sigh, her fingers weaving through her loose blond hair. “It would take a lot more than an ex-boyfriend and some stalking to come between those two. If they managed to make it this far, then I’m pretty sure that they’re in it for the long haul, no matter what.”  
  
Winry nodded slowly in agreement. She’d had her own reservations back when she and Riza set the boys up on their initial blind date. At first, it didn’t seem likely that a guy who couldn’t get along with anyone and a guy who got along with everyone just a little _too well_ would have much of anything in common at all, let alone start a relationship and successfully keep it going. But she was wrong about that, and gladly so. And now they were getting married.  
  
Miracles _did_ happen, after all.  
  
“Do you ever think about it?” she inquired suddenly.  
  
“Think about what?”  
  
“... Marriage.”  
  
Winry shyly glanced up from Riza’s feet and found the woman watching her closely.  
  
“Are you asking me to marry you?” Riza wanted to know.  
  
Now it was Winry’s turn for a suspiciously quick denial. “No,” she insisted, her cheeks growing pink. “I… I was just curious what you thought about it. That’s all.”  
  
Riza smiled at her lover, a warm and beautiful smile that lit up her entire face. She sat up and scooted close to Winry, wrapping her arms around the young woman and pulling her close.  
  
“I don’t need a ring to know that I love you,” she began as she nuzzled her way along Winry’s neck and shoulder. “And I don’t need to say ‘I do’ to know that I want to spend the rest of my life with you. But…”  
  
She cupped Winry’s face in her hands and turned it towards her.  
  
“But what?” Winry asked, her eyes wide and questioning.  
  
“I wouldn’t mind it, either.”  
  
Riza drew her into a long and lingering kiss that left them both breathless. And whatever worries that Winry had about Riza’s willingness to take the same leap as Roy and Ed vanished by the time they parted.  
  
“I love you, Riza,” she said softly as she reached out and grabbed the other woman by the hand.  
  
“Hey now, don’t get all gooey on me.” Riza paused and reconsidered, her face growing decidedly lecherous. “”Well… I mean… you know… at least wait until we go to bed.”  
  
“Riza!”  
  
The two women laughed. After a while, Winry rose to her feet, pulling Riza along with her.  
  
“Come on,” she said, leading the way towards the bedroom. “Let’s see if you’ve got some life left in those fingers.”  
  
“ _Now_ who’s the pervert?”  
  
The couple disappeared into their room, where Riza soon demonstrated that her hands were still very much in working order.  
  
Later, Winry clung to Riza’s body, physically _and_ emotionally sated. As she dozed off, she realized that Riza was right. They didn’t need symbols or ceremonies to demonstrate how they felt about each other… but it made her happier than words could have ever expressed to know that the option was there.  
  
One day, it would be _their_ turn to take that leap.  
  
And she could hardly wait.


	9. Conflict Resolution

A good five minutes passed before either man did any actual talking. Instead, they just sat there on the living room floor, contemplating the silence. It was not an uncomfortable silence, more of the _what now?_ variety. Ed knew that he needed to say something first; this entire shit show was his fault, after all. But he wasn’t quite sure if he was even capable of voicing all of the things that he wanted to express, and the last thing he wanted to do was make matters worse. Still, he had to try.  
  
“I’m sorry, Roy,” he began, mentally feeling his way around the right words while his fingers nervously picked at the Debbie Gibson CD case in front of him. “It’s just that when I found out about you and Maes, I realized there was a lot about your past that I still don’t know.”  
  
Ed shook his head and let out a long sigh. He glanced at Roy, who was still studying the carpet. The fact that they were not making eye contact was the reason he felt slightly more confident about continuing.  
  
“I want to know _everything_ about you. Not because I’m trying to be nosy… even though yeah, I guess that _is_ being nosy in a way.  But I mean that I want to know what you were like _back then_. Back before you...”  
  
“Became the stuck up man-whore you fell in love with?” Roy offered.  
  
Grinning at the unexpected but ever so accurate response, Ed turned to look at Roy again and found him staring back with an amused and affectionate expression.  
  
“Yeah.” The teen focused his attention elsewhere, knowing damn well that if he stared at Roy much longer, he was going to say or do something disgustingly emotional. “The way I went about it was all wrong,” he added softly. “Really, _really_ wrong. But… yeah.”  
  
Ed sighed again, and when he felt the warmth of a palm against his cheek and fingers stroking his skin with care, he thought that he just might break from happiness.  
  
And that was the moment he knew _for sure_ that everything was going to be okay.  
  
“I’ll be right back.” Roy pulled his hand away and rose to his feet, then disappeared into the bedroom.  
  
A confused Ed tilted his head as the sound of rummaging and muttering hit his ears. What the hell was Roy doing in there?  
  
He got his answer a couple of minutes later when Roy returned with a large book of some sort in his hands. Just as Ed was about to ask what it was, Roy handed it to him so that he could see for himself.  
  
It was a high school yearbook.  
  
Ed opened the cover, uncertain of what to expect. He then chortled as his eyes happened upon crudely drawn male genitalia smack dab in the middle of a bunch of handwritten well-wishes. The artist, Heymans Breda according to the horribly scribbled signature just below a pair of lopsided balls, even went so far as to add a few spurts of… something… coming from the tip of the penis. A true adolescent work of art.  
  
“Nice,” Ed said as Roy sat down beside him again. He started flipping through the pages, taking in the names and faces of his partner’s old classmates. There was Maes, who did not look much different than he did now, save for the facial hair. Ed could reluctantly see why Roy had fallen for the guy. Even as a teenager, he was annoyingly good-looking.  
  
When he came to the M section of the senior photos, he slowed down, his eyes scanning… searching… and finally finding what he was looking for.  
  
Roy’s bangs were shorter than they were now and there was a kind of sweetness in his smile that fascinated Ed. This was eighteen-year-old Roy Mustang at the starting line of adulthood, back when life was full of possibilities and the worst thing he had to fear was a random dick being drawn on his possessions, before the broken heart and subsequent years of narrowly avoiding sexually transmitted diseases.  
  
Ed did not know this Roy. But he realized that he loved him just the same.  
  
“What do you think?” Roy wanted to know.  
  
“You were cute.”  
  
“I looked like a dork.”  
  
“Well… yeah. That, too.”  
  
They spent the next half hour going through the yearbook. About five of those minutes were devoted to laughing at Riza’s insanely teased hair, as was apparently the fashion at the time, and another five were spent admiring Roy’s JROTC pictures. Ed had to admit that the man looked pretty damn good in a uniform.  
  
All the while, Roy told numerous tales of his high school days, and although many of them included Maes in one way or another, Ed discovered that he actually did not mind hearing about their juvenile adventures, most of which involved getting drunk or terrorizing their JROTC instructor. Or both.  
  
After they were done, Ed closed the book and set it aside. “Thank you for showing me that,” he said, resting his head on Roy’s shoulder.  
  
“You’re welcome.”  
  
“So...” Ed closed his eyes as an arm wrapped around him. “Do you still want to marry me?”  
  
“Of course I do,” Roy replied, planting a kiss on top of his head. “Even though I don’t like what you did, I understand why you did it. But from now on, if there’s ever anything you want to know about me, just _ask_ me, okay?”  
  
“Okay.”  
  
“Besides,” the older man continued. “We’ve been through too much to let something like this come between us.”  
  
“Yeah, we have,” Ed agreed.  
  
“And Riza threatened to kill me if I called off the wedding.”  
  
Ed made a mental note to thank her later. For now, he was more than content to let Roy draw him into a kiss and gently push him down to the floor, and even that stupid CD case poking him in the back was not nearly reason enough to stop what they were doing.  
  
It didn’t take long for the two men to work themselves into a frenzy. While the rational part of Ed wanted to suggest that they move into the bedroom as the softness of a mattress was far preferable to the roughness and eventual burn of the carpet, the other part of him, the one that was gradually losing his mind over the painfully slow grind of a very hard cock, had no intention whatsoever of stopping.  
  
“Roy,” he moaned against the other man’s shoulder as he tried to reach between their bodies, desperate to get at his zipper because there were entirely too many layers of clothes getting in the way of what he wanted.  
  
Understanding what Ed desired, especially since it was the same thing that he desired himself, Roy sat up, resting back on his heels. He retrieved a small bottle of lube from his pocket, earning him a look of amused suspicion.  
  
“I grabbed it when I got my yearbook,” he explained with a shrug. “I thought it wouldn’t hurt to be prepared.”  
  
“You’re a regular Boy Scout.” Ed reached out and squeezed the tent in Roy’s pants, to which Roy responded with a low groan.  
  
They got naked in a hurry, carelessly flinging their clothes all over the living room floor. Roy grabbed onto Ed’s hand and pulled him up, then guided him over to the coffee table and bent him over it in anticipation of using it in a manner for which it was never intended.  
  
Ed hissed and shuddered as slick fingers stretched him open and a skillful mouth sucked and licked along his back. He briefly considered the mess they were about to make of their poor, innocent carpet but then Roy was behind him, grabbing him by the hips, sliding into him, filling him, _fucking him_ , and who the hell had time to worry about carpets when Roy was taking such blissfully complete advantage of his body?  
  
Flesh and automail fingers slid against the glass top of the table with each thrust, pushing aside coasters and remotes and a stack of mail that had yet to be read. Ed lowered his head, his cries muffled in the crook of his arm, and he arched back as much as possible so that Roy could go even deeper.  
  
Roy’s left hand covered his and their fingers instinctively twined while the right, still wet with lube, reached between Ed’s legs and started stroking his cock. Ed moaned as Roy jerked him off, overcome by the rising pleasure that assaulted him in front and back.  With a resounding cry, he came all over the underside of the table and Roy’s hand and the carpet, screaming a most impressive combination of profanities in the midst of a crippling orgasm, whereupon Roy let go and pounded into him until he reached his own much needed end.  
  
They stayed that way for a while, Ed draped across the table and Roy draped across him, both of them reeling from release and trying to catch their breath. Eventually, they sank down to the floor, coming to rest on top of Ed’s shirt and Roy’s right shoe.  
  
When Ed was able to see straight again, he looked at the mess underneath the coffee table and chuckled. “Oops,” was all he could say.  
  
After tossing his shoe aside, Roy propped himself up on an elbow and peered over Ed’s shoulder. “Have fun cleaning that up.”  
  
“You’re going to help me, you know.”  
  
“That came out of _you_.”  
  
“ _You’re_ the reason it came out of me!”  
  
And so continued their post-coital debate over the etiquette of spunk removal. After finally reaching a compromise (Ed would clean the table and Roy agreed to handle the carpet), the lovers made their way into the bathroom to shower and dress.  
  
When they were finished with that, they returned to the living room and worked together to make it presentable once again. Ed knew deep down that he would never look at the coffee table the same way again.  
  
Since Roy had forgotten to pick up some carryout, they ordered a pizza and ate it while sitting on the couch and listening to--who else?--Debbie Fucking Gibson. They talked about a number of things, both serious and silly. Ed told Roy about Maes’ visit and Roy revealed that he would never make for much of a ribbon curler.  
  
“Hey, Roy,” Ed said later, after they had finished eating.  
  
“Yeah?”  
  
“I think…”  
  
Ed paused for a moment and tried to figure out the best way to continue, or if he even should. Everything was back to normal now and he wanted it to stay that way. But even so, he also felt compelled to say what was on his mind.  
  
“I think that you and Maes should be friends again. One day. If you want.”  
  
“... Why?”  
  
Ed shifted on the seat and winced at the effort required to do so. It occurred to him that perhaps he and Roy should hold off on the sex until after they were married, lest he be reduced to limping and hobbling down the aisle on account of a sore and well-fucked ass.  
  
“Because good friends are hard to come by. And judging from what you told me, the two of you were pretty close, even before… everything happened.”  
  
Now it was Roy’s turn to fall silent.  Almost a minute passed before he spoke again.  
  
“You really feel that way?” he asked.  
  
Nodding, Ed replied, “I really do.”  
  
After taking a trip down memory lane with Roy, Ed was surprised by just how much he was truly okay with the idea. Obviously, the decision was ultimately Roy’s to make, but Ed wanted to be sure that it was clear that Roy had his full support.  
  
“I don’t know, Ed. Maybe someday. But I’m not worried about it right now.” Roy leaned forward and snatched the notepad off the now squeaky-clean, cum-free coffee table. “What I _am_ worried about is Riza and her very big gun. Come on. Let’s get to work.”  
  
They spent the rest of the night playing with their rabbits and coming up with a selection of songs that they could both agree on, hence the tragic lack of Tiffany.  
  
After that, they went to bed.  Ed declared that there would be no more sex before the wedding and proceeded to demonstrate that his mouth and hands were still perfectly capable of working wonders.   
  
The next five days were a frantic blur. From verbal invitations (aka phone calls) to announcements to reception and honeymoon planning to final fittings and roughly a million little things in between, Roy, Ed, Riza, and Winry worked at a breakneck pace to get everything ready for the main event.  
  
Then came the sixth day.  
  
The most important day of all.  
  
Roy and Ed’s wedding day had finally arrived.


	10. Happily Ever After

In the mad rush to find a suitable location for Roy and Ed’s wedding--as opposed to cramming everyone into their living room--Riza had miraculously arranged for the ceremony to be held at an exclusive private events facility known for having a two year wait list. When Roy asked her how she pulled off such an accomplishment, she simply (and a little too innocently) insisted that she was very persuasive with the management. Roy strongly suspected that her persuasiveness included guns and thinly-veiled threats to vital body parts but he and Ed were way too pleased with the end result to worry about it.  
  
It was a simple yet stunning set-up, including an arch that was decorated with flowers and flowing fabrics in numerous shades of purple, from mauve to byzantium to all sorts of shades in between that Roy had no idea existed. The guests were seated in chairs that were wrapped with purple sashes and placed on either side of an aisle runner that was sprinkled with purple rose petals. For having only a week to get everything together, it was more than the couple ever expected.  
  
“Will you quit peeking?” Riza growled as she yanked them away from the door. “You can wait five more minutes.”  
  
“But we want to see it.” Ed stepped behind Winry in case Riza decided to attack. “Especially since we didn’t get to do a proper rehearsal.”  
  
“It’s beautiful,” Roy said. With a warm smile he added, “Thank you very much.”  
  
Riza quickly averted her gaze. “It wasn’t a big deal so stop with the mushy shit.”  
  
“Somebody’s feeling emotional,” Winry mumbled to Ed.  
  
“I am _not_ ,” Riza snapped, offended by the thought.  
  
Roy secretly believed that the day would not pass without the emotionally impenetrable Riza Hawkeye shedding at least one tear, but he wisely opted to keep that to himself.  
  
The celebrant poked her head out the door, warning them that they only had a few minutes left before the show started. While Riza and Winry pulled and tugged at each other’s dresses (which were purple, of course) to make sure everything was in working order, Roy approached Ed and grabbed him by the hand. “Hey there, little guy.”  
  
Ed chuckled at the dig, a reminder of the day they met. “Watch it. It’s not too late for me to ditch you.”  
  
“Try telling Riza that,” Roy said. “How do I look?”  
  
Golden eyes looked Roy up and down. “Good enough to eat.”  
  
“Oh yeah?” Roy slipped his free hand beneath Ed’s tuxedo jacket, running it along his vest, his fingers groping and kneading at the muscle beneath. “I’m going to hold you to that.”  
  
He leaned forward to kiss him—  
  
“Seriously guys?” Winry spoke up, shaking her head at the couple. “You’re getting married in ten seconds.”  
  
“So keep it in your goddamn pants until after the reception,” Riza ordered.  
  
“Fine.” Roy let go of Ed’s hand as Winry nudged him out of the way and took the young man by the arm. After considering their options, it only seemed right that they were accompanied down the aisle by their dearest friends, especially since they would have never even met if not for them.  
  
“Everybody ready?” Riza asked as the music started. “Let’s get this over with because these heels are kicking my ass.”  
  
With that, Ed and Winry disappeared through the door. Roy sighed and waited for some sort of last second lecture.  
  
What Riza said instead took him completely by surprise.  
  
“Just so you know,” she began, once again curiously refusing to look directly at him. “After what happened with Maes, I didn’t think that you would ever be able to get close to anyone again. And I worried for you. I worried a lot. But here you are, _getting married_. ” She paused for a moment, clearing her throat. “I’m very happy for you, Roy. I wish nothing but the best for you and Ed.”  
  
“Riza…”  
  
“And if you say anything sentimental, I will punch you in the throat.”  
  
Roy smirked. “Never mind then.”  
  
But she didn’t say that he couldn’t _do_ anything sentimental, so he swept her into a crushing hug. “Okay,” he said after letting her go. “Here we go.”  
  
They stepped through the doors and started making their way down the aisle.  
  
“Look, Paul actually showed up,” he whispered as he acknowledged the small gathering of guests that watched them.  
  
“Did the two of you ever…”  
  
“Nope. He never knew the Joy of Roy.”  
  
“Poor Paul.”  
  
For some reason, Roy found that funny and he had to take great care not to start laughing out loud. “I still can’t believe the two of you did all of this on your own,” he said, changing the subject.  
  
“Well, we had some help,” Riza replied. “Do you remember my friend Olivia?”  
  
Roy did indeed remember Olivia Armstrong, a woman so intimidating that she made Riza look like a softy in comparison. “I thought she hated me.”  
  
“Can you blame her? You fucked her boyfriend.”  
  
“That was an accident.”  
  
“What, you tripped and fell into his ass? Now shut up and look charming.”  
  
All thoughts of scary women and unintentional intercourse were pushed to the side as Roy approached the arch and saw Ed’s smiling face. He felt a wave of love so overwhelming that it didn’t seem possible to put it into words (which was another reason to be glad that they decided not to write their own vows).  
  
When they reached the end of the aisle, Riza kissed him on the cheek and stood back next to Winry. Roy then took his rightful place beside Ed and together they faced the celebrant.  
  
“Good evening, everyone, and welcome to the wedding of Roy Mustang and Edward Elric...”  
  
 _Holy shit, I’m really getting married._  
  
*****  
  
 _Holy shit, I really got married._  
  
For Ed, the _only_ thing that could have made the day better was if his mother had been alive to see him get married. But Al was there, along with his on-again, off-again boyfriend Ling (or Ding-a-Ling, as Ed liked to call him). His “aunt” Izumi was also there with her husband, Sig. As far as family went, that was enough to make him happy.  
  
The ceremony went off without a hitch, except for one dreadful moment when Ed almost dropped Roy’s ring before he managed to slide it onto his finger. And that other dreadful moment when he almost got a hard on because Roy decided that it would be a good idea to slip him the tongue when they kissed. He had expected Riza to complain about that but she was too busy trying to convince Winry that her watery eyes were a result of allergies.  
  
They kicked off the reception by slow dancing to “Lost in Your Eyes,” which was every single bit as wonderful as Ed had imagined, even though he had to bury his face in Roy’s chest as they danced lest he fall victim to a case of “allergies” himself. Roy did everyone a favor by avoiding the Electric Slide, but sadly he could not be stopped when the DJ dedicated a block of overly upbeat Debbie Gibson tunes to him.  It was a sight unlike any other the world had ever seen.  
  
After making the rounds to thank everyone for coming on such short notice, along with some last minute rabbit babysitting tips for Winry, the couple changed into casual attire and made their escape to the hotel where they would spend the night before leaving for their honeymoon the following morning.  
  
“Can’t we just stay here for the next week?” Ed asked as he strolled round the enormous luxury suite.  
  
Roy closed the door and set down their bags. “And miss out on the chance for beach sex? Hell no.”  
  
“I think there are laws against that.”  
  
“Probably,” Roy admitted with a shrug. “But it wouldn’t be the first time that we engaged in a little public indecency.”  
  
“True.” Ed walked over to a window wall and opened the curtains, revealing a breathtaking nighttime view of the city. “Come over here.”  
  
The only sight he found lovelier than the view outside was that of their left hands resting side by side against the glass, both ring fingers now wearing a symbol of commitment to one another.  
  
“We did it,” he said quietly.  
  
“We did,” Roy agreed.  
  
Ed covered Roy’s hand with his own and met his gaze in the reflection of the glass. He felt a wave of love so overwhelming for his partner… no, his _husband_ … that he didn’t know how to begin to put it into words. Fortunately, Roy understood just the same and brought his right arm around Ed in a backwards embrace. Ed had no idea how long they stayed that way, but it didn’t matter. They could have remained that way forever for all he cared.  
  
But their bodies had other plans.  
  
“You’re poking me.”  
  
“Sorry.” Roy rested his chin on top of Ed’s head. “It’s been a long time.”  
  
“It’s been a week,” Ed stated. “And we did plenty of other things instead.”  
  
“So you _don’t_ want me inside of you?” Roy asked, leaning down to nuzzle the young man’s ear and neck.  
  
“Well…” Ed shuddered as Roy’s lips trailed along his skin. “I didn’t say _that_.”  
  
“Good. Stay here.”  
  
“Why?” A confused Ed tilted his head when Roy moved away from him. “What are you doing?”  
  
He watched as Roy turned out the lights and then rummaged through one of his bags to grab something before joining him again. By the time Ed realized exactly what he had in mind, Roy’s hand was already between his legs, thoroughly fondling him.  
  
“S-Someone might see us,” he warned shakily. Not that the possibility stopped him from rubbing himself against Roy’s palm.  
  
“The lights are out,” Roy pointed out while singlehandedly unzipping Ed’s pants. “And we’re ten floors up.”  
  
In the back of Ed’s mind, he wondered if maybe he should argue his case some more. But then Roy’s hand was curled around him, squeezing and stroking, and it just didn’t seem so important anymore.  
  
They stopped long enough to strip down naked and slammed against the glass in an entanglement of tongues and limbs. Ed hissed at the coolness against his back and hoped his ass wasn’t so damn pale that it would be noticeable that high up. If it was, then oh well, because he wasn’t about to stop now. He wrapped his leg high around Roy’s waist as slick digits reached underneath him and carefully worked him open, until he was fucking himself hard on Roy’s fingers without the first hint of concern for a possible audience.  
  
A short while later, he was bent over and fucking himself hard on Roy’s cock. And after almost a week without, it felt _amazing_. He closed his eyes and pressed his cheek against the glass, flesh and metal fingers sliding against the smooth surface, his hips rocking back against Roy, driving the other man’s cock deeper and deeper inside of him.  
  
“Damn it, Ed, slow down.” Roy grunted and grabbed onto Ed’s hips. “I was hoping to last more than five minutes.”  
  
So was Ed. He reached between his legs and started to jerk himself off. As he did, he turned to look over his shoulder at Roy, slightly amused yet incredibly turned on by the other man’s lack of self-control. “We’ve got all night,” he managed between moans. “So come.”  
  
He yelped as Roy started pounding into him, his head thumping against the glass with every thrust. Ed’s hand moved faster, until it was nothing but a blur, and he was just coherent enough to feel a little sorry for what he was about to do to the glass before coming all over it. He was also dimly aware that Roy had seized him tightly, groaning into his hair as he came, which was just as well because there was no way that Ed could have remained standing on his own after that.  
  
“Can you make it into the bathroom or do I need to carry you?” Roy asked later.  
  
“I can walk.”  
  
“Are you sure?”  
  
Actually, Ed wasn’t sure at all. But then again he was far too stubborn to admit it. “Of course I’m sure.”  
  
“Okay then, tough guy.” Roy kissed him sweetly on the lips and followed that up with a playful smack on the rear. “See you in there.”  
  
Ed glared as the older man sauntered into the bathroom. _Cocky prick_ , he thought, shaking his head. _My husband is a cocky prick._  
  
 _… My husband._  
  
His expression gradually softened.  
  
“Husband.”  
  
He knew that the word would lose its magic someday, but hopefully not anytime soon.  
  
Ed hobbled his way into the bathroom, convinced that he would never stop smiling.  
  
… Then Roy fucked him again in the shower and lasted _well_ beyond five minutes, whereupon Ed was convinced that he would never stop screaming.  
  
*****  
  
After an evening filled with sex, dinner, sex, a snack, sex, and finally even _more_ sex, the exhausted newlyweds curled up in bed together.  
  
“How long is our flight tomorrow?” Ed wanted to know.  
  
Roy reached down and cupped Ed’s sore ass. “Long enough that you might hate me by the time we land.”  
  
“I’m sure I won’t hate you.” Now it was Ed’s turn to help himself to a handful of Roy’s ass. “But it might inspire me to return the favor as hard as I can once we get there.”  
  
“I’m looking forward to it.” After giving him a kiss, Roy remembered something. “You know, we never decided what to do about our last names.”  
  
“I thought we were going with ‘Elstang-Mustric?’”  
  
“As tempting as that sounds...” Roy’s voice trailed off as he took Ed’s hand into his own. “I think we should keep our names just the way they are.”  
  
“You do?”  
  
“I do. I like being Roy Mustang. More importantly, I’ve become quite attached to Edward Elric and I wouldn’t dream of doing anything to change him.”  
  
Ed regarded their hands and marveled yet again at their wedding rings. “Too late for that.”  
  
“Oh, Ed.” Roy stared at his husband while pushing away the locks of blond that had fallen into his face. “I love you so much.”  
  
It wasn't often that Roy expressed himself with such raw and heartfelt emotion, and when he did... well, sometimes it was just too much for Ed to handle. “I love you, too,” he muttered, hiding his face in Roy's chest.  
  
“‘Allergies’ again?”  
  
“Something like that.”  
  
Roy grinned and wrapped his arms around Ed, holding him close. It was hard for him to imagine life being any more perfect than it was right now… although he would change his mind the next day when a certain someone surprised him by wearing a short, clingy wedding dress and fucking him every way imaginable.  
  
They talked a little while longer about memories past and opportunities yet to come before eventually falling asleep, tired and happy and anxiously anticipating all of the adventures that awaited them in this brand new chapter of their lives.  
  
It was going to be the best chapter yet.  
  



End file.
